…is to keep building this life with you, Kassidy Jean.
Christmas has always felt a little magical to me. Growing up, my parents made sure the joy of the season was front and center. We decorated the tree together, made ornaments, crafted decorations, and leaned fully into all the cozy Christmas traditions.
When I enlisted in the Army, I did so knowing it probably meant missing holidays for at least four years. At the time, I had not even met Kass yet. She came into my life with her own set of Christmas traditions and the same romantic view of the holidays that I had grown up with. Once we started dating, I did everything I could to make sure I came home for Christmas. I was lucky enough to have leave saved, and each year I used it to get back to New Hampshire. I understood what I signed up for by enlisting, but Kass did not sign up for missed holidays, so getting home to her always felt important. Somehow, it worked out every time.
In 2015, I flew home for the holidays with the intention of blending traditions from both of our families while also starting some of our own. It felt important to honor where we each came from while making space for something that was just ours. One afternoon, Kass and I went to a craft store to pick up Christmas gifts for her family. While we were there, we grabbed a few blank pieces of wood and a wood burner so we could make our first ornaments together. I printed out a simple template and we drew dotted lines from New Hampshire, where Kass lived and where we both grew up, to Washington State, where I was stationed. It symbolized all the back-and-forth travel that defined our long-distance relationship, along with the promise that the distance was temporary and that “home was where the Kass is”.
Long distance was hard. Those two weeks home were a careful balance of family traditions and time carved out just for us. We spoiled each other with little trips, including a weekend at Indian Head Resort that still stands out as one of my favorites. Christmas felt just as magical as ever. We rang in the new year together, and then it was time for me to fly back to Washington.
Leaving Kass to slip back into Army mode was always incredibly difficult. Going from being together every minute of the day to wondering when I could sneak in a text during training or manage a quick FaceTime call never got easier.
What helped more than I expected was that ornament we made. Back in the barracks, my roommate and I had a tiny Christmas tree decorated with a random mix of flea market finds from Seattle, ornaments my mom mailed me, and others sent in care packages from local schools. I placed the ornament Kass and I made right at the front. I knew she had hers hanging on her own tree back home. Every time I looked at it, I wondered if she was looking at hers too.
Kass and I have now shared a decade of Christmases together. We have not missed a single one. That feels even more meaningful knowing that I nearly missed all Christmases altogether in 2017. Sitting here in 2025, that thought is still terrifying, but it is also how I ground myself. I am incredibly grateful to be building my life with this incredible woman.
When I really think about it, the answer is simple. All I want for Christmas is to keep building this life with Kass.
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